<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><?xml-stylesheet href="http://www.blogger.com/styles/atom.css" type="text/css"?><feed xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' xmlns:georss='http://www.georss.org/georss' xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896</id><updated>2011-04-21T11:24:55.853-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Guzzles the Clown's Happy Place</title><subtitle type='html'></subtitle><link rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default?max-results=100'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/'/><link rel='hub' href='http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><generator version='7.00' uri='http://www.blogger.com'>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>8</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>100</openSearch:itemsPerPage><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113359000566636093</id><published>2005-12-02T22:03:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-12-02T22:06:45.676-08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;img src="http://home.earthlink.net/~ntillemans/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/cw2.promo2.jpg"&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113359000566636093?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113359000566636093/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113359000566636093&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113359000566636093'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113359000566636093'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/12/blog-post.html' title=''/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113161312548685721</id><published>2005-11-10T00:58:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-10T00:58:45.493-08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://quizilla.com/users/darkmoonrain/quizzes/What%20rating%20is%20your%20journal%3F/"&gt;&lt;img src="http://images.quizilla.com/D/darkmoonrain/1056295829_sratedmc17.jpg" border="0" alt="mc17"&gt;&lt;br&gt; What rating is your journal?&lt;/a&gt;&lt;BR&gt; &lt;font size="-2"&gt;brought to you by &lt;a href="http://quizilla.com"&gt;Quizilla&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/font&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113161312548685721?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113161312548685721/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113161312548685721&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113161312548685721'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113161312548685721'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/what-rating-is-your-journal-brought-to.html' title=''/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113151182665375599</id><published>2005-11-08T20:45:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-08T20:50:26.660-08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>The Mark &amp; Clark Band: Jigsaw Woman&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I'm amazed    How do you do the things you do&lt;br /&gt;Can't believe     All the changes you put me through&lt;br /&gt;Your eyes      Tell me things I want to hear&lt;br /&gt;But when I make my move You always disappear&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Pick up the pieces now&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Show me that you love me somehow&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Pick up the pieces now&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Show me that you love me somehow&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I can see    That you're doin' too many things&lt;br /&gt;Can't you tell    That you're pullin' too many strings&lt;br /&gt;Your love   Takes me high and lets me fall&lt;br /&gt;But don't you realize    I gotta have it all&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Pick up the pieces now&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Show me that you love me somehow&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Pick up the pieces now&lt;br /&gt;Jigsaw woman   Show me that you love me somehow&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://home.earthlink.net/~ntillemans/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/markandclark.jpg"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://ryan.skow.org/church/construction/jigsaw.jpg"&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113151182665375599?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113151182665375599/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113151182665375599&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113151182665375599'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113151182665375599'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/mark-clark-band-jigsaw-woman-im-amazed.html' title=''/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113127081544365258</id><published>2005-11-06T01:38:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-06T01:54:41.536-08:00</updated><title type='text'>The Balloon Poodle</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/1600/100_0264.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/100_0264.jpg" border="0" alt="" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;TWIST YOUR BALLOONS INTO AN ANIMAL FRENZY!&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113127081544365258?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113127081544365258/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113127081544365258&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113127081544365258'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113127081544365258'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/balloon-poodle.html' title='The Balloon Poodle'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113107741210429914</id><published>2005-11-03T19:34:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-03T20:25:02.916-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Women</title><content type='html'>You take a chick out and show her a good time; but it's never good enough. It's not enough that you bring her home afterwards come buckets in her face or give her as much dick as she can handle and then some....that you make her cry and beg you to stop.  She expects you to bare your soul to her...maybe lie through your teeth and say something corny and insincere like: "I love you" or "You're beautiful."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I swear. Some guys are full of shit. They hand out compliments like they were disposing of used condoms or playing hot potato. It makes it hard for the rest of us to be ourselves and creates unreasonable expectations we, then, have to live up to like a bunch of pussies.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Not me. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If SHE'S drunk enough, SHE can't tell what you're saying...AND it's too late by the time SHE figures it out.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Just remember that...AND DON"T BE A FUCKIN' PUSSY.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113107741210429914?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113107741210429914/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113107741210429914&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113107741210429914'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113107741210429914'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/women.html' title='Women'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113099426445898051</id><published>2005-11-02T20:44:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-02T21:09:01.180-08:00</updated><title type='text'>The Problem with "Maybe Tomorrow"</title><content type='html'>Invariably tomorrow arrives, no matter how far off TOMORROW seemed the day before. And take any task you'd ever think of putting off until TOMORROW: It's exponentially more difficult to perform the task tomorrow. But, of course, putting it off again until tomorrow, the next day and so on, seems like a better idea with every new day. And, then, why bother performing said task at all? &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Yeah. Fuck it. Maybe it's not a problem after all.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113099426445898051?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113099426445898051/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113099426445898051&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113099426445898051'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113099426445898051'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/problem-with-maybe-tomorrow.html' title='The Problem with &quot;Maybe Tomorrow&quot;'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113091224584947345</id><published>2005-11-01T21:36:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-11-01T22:19:31.060-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Another Weekend Gone</title><content type='html'>I did the Halloween thing on Saturday night. Got blotto! And, later, got it on GUZZLES-STYLE with this freaky red head dressed up as a naughty corrections officer, short skirt, big tits, nice ass...filmed it all...she had no idea...didn't sober up till Monday...and, then, felt like a walking disaster...wondering what I might have said...what bridges I might have burned...what happened to that red head...picked up the pieces as best I could.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyways, Halloween, I passed-out before the first kid showed up on my doorstep in costume for treats. I slept through it all. I was in such a bad mood that I stayed in the rest of the night. I drank until I could hardly walk and blacked out. I woke up on the bathroom floor this morning, just  in time to touch up my make-up and rush off to work.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;It was a long day. Good to be back home drinking again.  I should probably clean out the refrigerator. It smells like spoiled meat. Every time I open it to grab a beer, I gag. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/drunk/"&gt;&lt;img src="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/images/drunk/b.jpg" title="Angry Drunk" alt="Angry Drunk" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/drunk/"&gt;What Kind of Drunk Are You?&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;small&gt;&lt;a href="http://rumandmonkey.com/"&gt;Brought to you by Rum and Monkey&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/small&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113091224584947345?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113091224584947345/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113091224584947345&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113091224584947345'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113091224584947345'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/11/another-weekend-gone.html' title='Another Weekend Gone'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18484896.post-113074981941399946</id><published>2005-10-31T01:08:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2005-10-31T22:20:43.700-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Fuckin' A</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/1600/guzzles.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg" border="0" alt="" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;It's party time!&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18484896-113074981941399946?l=guzzles.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/feeds/113074981941399946/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=18484896&amp;postID=113074981941399946&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113074981941399946'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/18484896/posts/default/113074981941399946'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://guzzles.blogspot.com/2005/10/fuckin.html' title='Fuckin&apos; A'/><author><name>Guzzles the Clown</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/00039254964676521545</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='23' height='32' src='http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2523/1810/320/guzzles.jpg'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry></feed>
